Back In Town

I have not posted in some time, but nobody was following this so I don't think any harm was done. At the end of August, I moved from Boise to Kalispell, the town im Montana where I was raised. My soul has always known I would return, and now I am back. It did take some effort, and I lost money to get out of my house. It does seem to be working out, none the less, there are difficulties I must face daily.

I am reminded of something my charming son once shared with me regarding "facing the inevitable and responsibilities." I held some papers in my hand regarding an impending court date I had, and I voiced my worry. He reached out, took the paper from my hand, placed it carefully on top of my refridgerator, and said "Just don't worry about it Mom, until the day before!"

My mother has been terrific, and I don't know how I'd make it without her help. She's been a better friend than I ever anticipated she could be, and the financial assistant has kept me afloat. She has helped in various areas, but I especially appreciate that she springs for Sunday breakfast out, as well as a flavored iced coffee everytime we are in the car.

The New Times New Roman

Have you heard that the font Georgia, is the new Times New Roman? Putting together a resume, I read that I was to use Georgia...and I did...and now I use it a lot! It still has that funny a though, and it makes me wonder: does anyone actually write an a like that when they have pencil/pen in hand, and not a keyboard? But look! When I put it in italics, it looks like the a I'm use to!

What Happens, Just Does

When I feel the way I do, anything seems possible. I am lonely, but probably because it has been rare, that I've been alone. I had a husband who controlled everything. I wouldn't have had it any differently. It was very neccesary, that everything be in place...proper.



Now, I know now that I must come to terms with myself, before I proceed. That has been told to me. RT has said that I need to do, just that, accept myself;love myself, before I go on. On with my existance, that is. I think I have accepted that challenge.



It is a challange, too. It holds me responsible for what might come next, and I have never held that kind of responsibility, close to my heart. It was always somebody else's call.


We'll see what happens next.

It Continues

Life continues and doesn't seem to get any easier. I've made phone calls, printed applications etc. It seems others must attest to the fact that I'm "handicapped." My classroom was a pleasent environment today, and I only wish that others could experience that all-emcompassing good feeling that is part of my everyday work. After staying late to prepare for another day, I went to the Tavern. G was there and I knew that would mean an unsolicited, free, adult beverage, so I hobbled in to sit down.

Unlike other times, I had to make the formal drink request and, although he was closing out his tab, he asked the bartender to serve me. He really can be very engaging. We spoke about my situation, and he was encouraging.

My brain, what's left of it (as my brother says,) is spinning, though. It's very hard to keep things straight. I remember what I remember, and I forget the rest, even if I try to write it down. Sometimes I'll say to myself "I need to remember that," and I'll write it down. But, I don't ever have to refer back to my notes. I just remember: who said it, how it was said, what followed, and so forth. Other times I'll think it's not that important and I don't write it down.

Those thoughts and comments are...lost...for...ever! Unless, of coures, the other half of the conversation remembers what has been spoken. And then, for certain, I will not believe anything they have to say!

Head injured people are allowed all sors of quirkiness, that others are not. At least that is what keeps many of us going!

Slow Going

I'm kind of learning may way, slowly, around this complicated entity (BLOGS.)  It hasn't been that easy, but when I can make a connection I feel pretty damn good.