The Judge

I have learned this much, a judge in Montana still has to wear a black robe, and it can be hot.  The same robe, though, can cover up the splotch a failed ink pen makes.  He can wear jeans on Friday, but must still wear a tie. On days other than Friday, he wears the tie with  khaki's and casual shoes, the kind you might wear to take an easy hike.  He does not wear cowboy boots, though, even though he's in Montana. He sometimes welcomes people, who will come before him, at the courtroom door. He has awarded bars to hang out at in order of protection cases, but he hasn't had a drink in 30 years.  He is a wonderful man!

Parallel Path

Parallel: relating to two things that are comparible, because they are similar and share many characteristics

Path: A route along which something moves

Could I be said lady on a parallel path? Let's think this through. I guess some might consider me a lady, because I'm female and no longer a child, but I have never thought of myself in those terms. I was once a child, a girl, and then an adult. I guess woman suits me better than lady. But, I can be a somebodies lady, I'm flexible. The important issue here though is what path am I on? That will take some thought..

I've thought about the path I'm on, over several days, but I can't really put my finger on it.  I guess for many years my kids path seemed more important than mine, but then I realized that they would do, what they would do.  Their father, and I, maybe made mistakes along the way, and our divorce was difficult for them, I'm sure, but the kids have muddled through and are doing well. Both of them are great people that I am proud of.

My path now, however, veered away from them, and I struggled through a few years of working to prove I had what it took to be successfull in my own right.  I've switched things up, and things really are all about me right now, and all those who had been saying that anyway, are now speaking the truth.  Back to my path, though, and whether it os parallel to one of my new friend's.

I have been enlightened, regarding his path, and  it is sad, for me at least, that my path may not be parallel to his. If I were the person I wish I was, in a perfect world for me, I'd say that it might be possible.  Still, it might be way down the gravel road, out past town, and nearer paradise. The way it was explained to me, individuals on parallel paths might bump into one another now and then, and that would be totally acceptable, but would never become entwined.  So, another probable relationship takes a nose dive, and I think I recognize that desire to not become entwined.  It raised its ugly head once before, so I might just let this one go.

Was it Good for You Too?

The weekend went too damn quick, like they always do. You work all week and hope that the Saturday or Sunday, maybe, will bring you something new and exciting. Plans are never very concrete for me, unless someone else makes them. I had wanted to go for a drive around the big old lake I had spent my summers on as a child. My head is cram packed with vivid, colorful memories from those times, and I wanted to see what was better: my memories or the recollections I might have up close and personal.



And it wasn't just the lake that interested me. I'd be taking the trip with a guy I had seen previously. It's hard to say whether or not we had been on a "date," but I like to think we had. We had spoken on the phone and he did pick me up, at my sister's, and we went to dinner. But I can't help but think he thought of it as meeting an aquaintance. We had some history, but only some. That had went well, I thought, but I always think things go well. I'm overly optimistic, I think. The best is what is always in the back of my mind. Is it because of my head injury? Am I not thinking straight? Those are questions I struggle with from time to time.



I know that memory can be an issue after hitting your head way too hard, and I have experienced it. This head injured individual has always dealt with it, though, in terms of short term memory. For example, please don't ask me anything about a previous day's meal, and expect me to answer quickly, or for that matter, correctly! People tell me that those memory lapses have nothing to do with my head injury, but the difference is that I always default to that as the reason. In a way I am lucky to always have a reason, for my difficulties that is.

But the question remains: does my optimism have something to do with my head injury? Am I totally off base? I think that I might be an OK person, then I am reminded of what my charming ex-husband always told me. He said it's not always about you, and he was right. It's not always about me.